It has been nearly six months.  He has moved on.  I am trying. 

It still hurts.  It hurts a lot.  

I have made some big changes in my life…my home, my job, my priorities.  I am trying to adjust.  He used to be my number one priority.  I have learned not to invest myself fully in another person, because the result of disappointment and of losing that person is just too much for me.  My number one priority now is myself.  Me.  Making myself happy.  No one else can but me.  And for as long as I am alive, I will always be here.  I am not going to leave me.  

We are born alone and we die alone.  That’s what they say.  It’s true.  I thought I had found the one I would grow old with, the one who would be there for me through everything…marriage, didelphic pregnancies, raising a family, building a home, vacations, retirement.  We had so much to look forward to.  But now in my future, I only see me.  And me alone.  My goals now involve only me.  I can’t count on another person.  I just can’t.